Oh Boy, Oh Joy!

In which I try to put on a happy face.

I have realized that a lot of my musings here haven’t been the most optimistic. The Summer of Das Boot has really bummed me out, frankly. Plus the world is terrible, AI is disrupting my career in new ways every single day, everyone I know in the creative arts is struggling mightily (and many are simply quietly quitting). Plus the weather! GOSH!! We had tornadoes again in the Chicago area this past Monday. At noon the sky was so dark, all the outdoor lights turned on. And the rain!! Buckets and buckets and buckets.

Anyhoo. You get the picture.

But today I am determined to talk about good things! By nature, I’m an optimistic pessimist; I’m always positive something bad will happen. However, even I, Ms. Scrooge, am aware that this outlook can take its toll plus people will stop inviting you places if all you do is mope. So here, with much fanfare, are a few things that have brought a smile to my face these past weeks:

Sitting in my patio garden (when it’s not raining and tornado-ing). Every year of container gardening has been trial and error. We have a back patio deck which is simple: it has rail flower boxes of begonias and hanging baskets of fuchsia, and enough air circulation and morning sun that it takes care of itself. But the lower, garden-level front walled patio is different. It has so much more potential but it has more problems, too—poor air circulation (we have a fan on constantly to keep the air moving), more mosquitoes and flies, and less sun. I’ve found that some flowers will just rot off at the stem down there (begonias, mostly). Impatiens do well but they don’t flower as much as I’d like due to the lack of sun. Etc., etc. But this year! This year, I think I got it! I decided to plant perennials as annuals and have lots of ferns, hostas, ivy and even a hydrangea in pots. I’m writing this post in this pretty garden space. It’s my favorite, as it reminds me of a little Paris courtyard:

Chicago! Chicago makes me smile, always. But with Das Boot, husband and I haven’t been enjoying our usual Chicago summer, which entails a lot of walking. Still, last week we went to perhaps the prettiest outdoor dining spot, Chicago Cut (a place we can afford to visit only once a year!). It was a perfect day, even a little chilly, but at least we got out of the house and enjoyed the view!

Friends! We have managed to connect with a lot of friends these last couple of weeks, between driving to Indiana and seeing people we haven’t seen in years and going out to dinner here with newer friends and even going to – gasp! – a backyard party this last weekend. And my bestie Ed and I went out and got tipsy a couple of weeks ago, something we occasionally do without our husbands so we can talk about them. (Ed got tipsy. I got – more than tipsy. It was epic, and I haven’t done that in forever and you know what? I don’t think I’ll ever do it again. Some things are best left as youthful memories.)

Reading! Well, actually, I’ve been in a huge reading slump for weeks. I’ve started and stopped so many novels but a few did stand out, mainly Country People by Daniel Mason. I have recommended it to everyone. It’s funny and delightful and perfect. I loved his last novel, North Woods, and this isn’t quite as epic as that was, but it’s genuinely funny and heartwarming and generous.

And this leads me to:

Simplifying. I’m pretty done with the world right now, as it is. AI, as I mentioned. Social media—now that my last novel has been out for a couple of months, I’m pulling back. I am not a person who likes social media. I actively dislike it. There are good things, or at least there were in the beginning, mainly connection. Connecting with old friends, connecting with readers. But the hysteria and vitriol and people who are hellbent on ruining lives based on innocuous posts; it’s not my cup of tea. So I’ve given myself a break from it and also, then, I found myself looking back to when I was most happy and content with life, which was before social media and before AI and before streaming and all the NOISE. Back when I used to watch local television for my news, listened to the radio, not podcasts, read magazines (something I just realized I’ve stopped doing, and I have no idea why), and read the type of books people aren’t publishing much of these days. So to that end, these last couple of days I’ve: Started my day watching the WGN Morning News, something I used to do daily. Listened to WGN talk radio during the day. Read the latest issue of InStyle Magazine (OK, I read it on my laptop, but still!). And started re-reading a trilogy of books that I read, and loved, years ago: The Old Filth Trilogy by Jane Gardam. I love all things British, as you know, particularly the literature, and these fit the bill. (I might reread another favorite series, The Cazelet Chronicles by Elizabeth Jane Howard, next.) I’m going to link to someone whose written about the Old Filth Trilogy better than I can, to give you a taste of it. Anyway, re-reading these old favorites not only satisfies my desire for a certain type of book but also reminds me of happier, simpler times, and I crave those times right now, in particular.

I used to shake my head at my dad when he refused to embrace new things as he aged. And I don’t think I’m doing that! But I understand, now, that sometimes the world does move too fast and seem too alien and unfriendly, and our brains need to find safe harbors. And sometimes—perhaps most times—those safe harbors are memories of the past. But I don’t want only to live in memories, which is why I’m trying to reintroduce some of those simpler things into this more complicated world, and find a happy middle ground, a peaceful life.

More and more, this is my main quest every single day.

What could you do, or what do you do, in your own life, to combine a simpler past with a hectic present and create a peaceful life?